I have a wicked case of the “Mondays” today. Don’t know why – I am feeling uninspired by everything.
I have prattled on and on about life on the farm – but some people (family excluded) may not know much about me so I am going to talk just a wee bit about me.
I am female (d’uh) 40somethingish years old – OK I am 48 – I said it out loud!!! HAPPY NOW!!! – I am 48 but quite frankly I still mentally feel like I am like 25.
Today my body feels like I am 80 because of the hay delivery yesterday – but save that for another time.
I am a 48 (ugh) year old female and the mother of two children. They have requested I not use their names but most of you know me on FB so you’ll know their names. My daughter is 25 and is…just…Lord I am so proud of that girl. She is me – at 25 minus the “her” that I had when I was almost that age. Smart, grounded, so pretty and I ain’t saying that because I am her mama – she is so pretty – inside and out. Just a wonderful young woman. So amazing and a kind kind soul. Sunshine in my life. I can have the shittiest day and a call from her and I just smile. We are kindred spirits.
My son is 20 – that man drives me insane. Gloriously and goofy insane. My son – there is a tune in his head – no one can hear but him – and he works/studies/grooves to this tune that is just him. He is quirky, creative, odd and unique to the core. Whimsical at times and incredibly intelligent and passionate. Puts others before him and suffers from depression that hurts my heart as I cannot help him with that.
But enough about them – more about ME!!!!
I come from a large family – we are breeders – not so much me – but my parents and their siblings generation tend to the larger families. I love my family!!! I really do. As children the cousins and us were so tight and then you get older and you lose touch and you try and regain. The ones that matter – I would like to think we are tight. We are fighters and cynical and comical and idiots and passionate and care and etc etc etc. We Are Family – lalalalalalala! throwback.
I was married once. It ended. End of Story. I won’t get into it. It was there, then it was not and then it ended.
I have been in a serious committed relationship since 2001 and have found my partner in crime. He understands me, he puts up with me and my disjointed idiocy bitchy moods and smiles. He has a totally disgusting and twisted sense of humour that I adore and is frigging BRILLIANT and can fix anything. He is the “Rock” to my “Roll”.
I have been a serious committed (or should be) job since 2001 – hey hey – interesting as Hubby pushed me to take the job 🙂 I love my job some day’s I just love it more than others.
I am an emotional person. Others (work colleagues) don’t see it – but I am. I hurt when my friends are sad. I cry at movies – commercials – time changes – weather changes…
If I could go back to my 16 year old self (and family will understand why this age is important) you know what I would say to myself???? Nothing – I would say nothing – I would do nothing differently – I would not try and sway/change the course of my younger self’s life because everything that idiot did led her to the place where she types this rather long winded and quite frankly somewhat depressing blog entry.
This self has amazing children – amazing partner – amazing family and amazing friends and if this self had not gone through all “that self’s” crap – this self would not be who she is today.
The end!!
PS – the “boys” are fine – the weather somewhat sucks – I promise it will be more light hearted next post.
Cheers.
Orange Acres 