Chicken Math….

A friend of mine got her first ever chickens.

I am so happy for her – there is nothing – to me anyway – that is more fun than owning our flightless children.

Descended from Gods they are – dinosaurs actually.

If you’ve ever seen Jurassic Park (no copy rite infringement intended) you’ll get it.

When those velociraptors are walking about??? Dude – I see my cranky hennie every time.

That brings us to Chicken Math.

Chicken Math is not like regular math or advanced math. ie. if Hennie took a train going southbound at 45 kms per hour while Roo took a northbound at 35 kms per hour who would cross the road first math.

Nuh uh – this is special math.

I  – for one – started with 3 chickens. One Roo – Two Hennies. Well Hennies hatches some chicks and then we had more.

Foxie came in an stole some so we had to reinforce and start again.

Add a couple more.

Go on vacation – get wiped out save two hens.

Start over – hit up a couple of auctions – hatch a few more and before you know it your rocking 30 plus dang birds!!!

You cannot just give them away (will not is more appropriate) because you have become so damn attached to the freeloading non egg laying slackers.

And while you think you can just rehome a Roo – nope they have a name too and again see above – attached.

Winter hits – less than hearty birds just don’t survive  we lost two this winter  – BUT the math is still solid.

OH and that does not even take into account the rescue bird that simply will not survive  the cold that is literally living in my office – no shit – Ima lookin’ right at her.

The ladies get too old to lay – nope – can’t just off them – they have names and are so much fun to hang out with.

See – chicken math.

Bottom line – I do love my birds. It is my every intention for them to live out their dinosaur like lives – I keep them fed and safe and warm.

They are like that name brand potato chip that everyone talks about that hens do – Lay’s you can’t have just one!!!!

Oh   – FYI – this is Darling Diva – she is a battery rescue who was completely bald  – our first cold snap last December left her shivering and freezing in our coop. She has spent her winter convalescing in MY office in an extra-large dog crate- she gets out frequently to roam our home – the cats don’t mind her much anymore. She will rejoin her flock soon but I think will always come home inside at night-time. Right now she is snoring away.